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YouTube Channel Supplements Income by Selling Ugliest T-Shirt You’ve Ever Seen

LOS ANGELES — YouTuber David Patterson, better known by his online moniker SuperVGMan64, just announced his first ever merch drop for his channel, planning to supplement his income with the ugliest T-shirt you’ve ever seen in your life.

“I’m a bit new to designing merch, but I decided that I didn’t need to hire a designer, use a professional tool, or even ask a single living soul for notes before bulk-ordering 11,000 of them,” Patterson announced on his channel Saturday. “I’m sure they’ll do well, I mean we just passed over six HUNDRED subscribers! That’s insane! So be sure to get them while they’re hot, because who knows when I’ll restock. Also, be sure to order soon because I’m packaging and shipping them out personally on my own, so you probably won’t receive it until next year.”

SuperVGMan’s fanbase has mixed opinions about purchasing the shirt. 

“Look, I want to support the guy, but Jesus Christ,” said fan James Crichton. “I’d rather just donate him the money than have this thin, flaky screen-printed T-shirt clog up my dresser. I know I’ll never have the confidence to wear it as anything but a sleep shirt, but I’m worried that if I don’t buy one, he’ll keep trying. I’m fucked either way.”

Patterson went on to elaborate on the thought process behind the shirt’s design.

“I wanted to keep it simple, and clean for my first design, so it’s a low-res photo of my gawking face blown up incredibly large,” Patterson said. “Then it has obnoxious neon colors spelling out a very niche and out-of-context reference to my channel. Don’t worry fans, I made sure that anyone reading it would be completely befuddled unless they have intimate knowledge of my content. For anyone who wants to buy more than one, I made sure to print the shirt in the standard mucus green AND bright yellow.”

At press time, Patterson had also teased his next upcoming merch drop, a flimsy Gildan hoodie on sale for $90.

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