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Sensei Can’t Fucking Wait to Tell Story About Talented Former Student Who Turned Evil

KITAKYUSHU, Japan — After decades of shame for having bread such a destructive agent of chaos, local sensei Ieda Ryuji reportedly cannot fucking wait to finally tell the story about his talented former pupil who turned evil. 

“Telling a story about a former student who turned evil and who I must eventually fight is one of the most exciting moments in any sensei’s career,” beamed Sensei Ryuji adjusting the curtains in his dojo so the moonlight perfectly reflected the dramatic mood. “This is sure to send chills down the spines of all of my current students and explain why I have a subtle air of self-hatred about me.”

When asked to reflect on if his former student’s transformation into a monster was preventable, Ryuji admitted he could have been more attentive to some character flaws. 

“He always had a darkness in him,” recalled Ryuji. “I remember one morning I found him in the forest flattening bullfrogs against a tree stump with a mace, like he was chopping wood. His speed…his power…his determination… unlike anything I’d ever seen.”

Students who were once classmates with the talented former pupil also attested to the warning signs that became steadily more obvious. 

“He had an obsession with mastering the forbidden techniques,” said his former training partner, Amano Yuki. “He is the reason I have this,” continued Yuki, revealing a scar on his torso shaped unmistakably like a bullfrog. “I have no idea what it means.”

At press time, Sensei Ryuji was preparing to battle in the forest with his former student after finding Yuki’s mangled corpse on a tree stump. 

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