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Rian Johnson Teases Third ‘Knives Out’ Movie by Murdering Stanley Tucci

LOS ANGELES — After the Netflix hit Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery, writer/director Rian Johnson released a cryptic teaser for the upcoming untitled Knives Out 3 by murdering character actor Stanley Tucci in cold blood.

“I don’t want to give anything away just yet, I just want to show everyone that I have some exciting ideas for the next film already,” a blood-stained Johnson said. “Stanley is such a fun actor to play around with, whether improvising with him on set or toying with him bound and gagged as I slowly let the blood drain out from his head. The Netflix people have been so lenient with me, and have provided me all the creative freedom I want when conducting my methodical killing of Tucci to advertise the next installment.”

Knives Out fans are already ecstatic to see the gruesome advertisement for the third film in the franchise.

“It’s always so exciting to see the fun, random ensemble of these whodunnits, whether some of them are killed off during the movie, or before the movie even releases,” said Knives Out superfan Kenna Harbrook. “Tucci is such a perfect pick for one of these movies; you don’t know if you can trust him or not, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he won’t be the villain both because he’s a little too obvious and also his body has been dismembered before filming has even begun.”

“When I saw the announcement I was like ‘oh my god I’m dead,’” she added, “but in the emotional sense. Not in the Tucci sense — he actually is dead now.”

The series’ star detective, Daniel Craig, said that he and Johnson have already started to collaborate on the project.

“Rian and I have a lot of exciting plans, I can’t give anything away but lots of great character actors are going to die. We also have a lot of plans for the movie as well,” Craig said. “I can’t wait for everyone to see our next gory mystery unfold before their eyes. Also I’m excited for people to see the movie. We’ve already sat down and sketched out most of the deaths we’re planning, we’ve done so many that we haven’t even started planning Knives Out 3 yet.”

At press time, sources reported that although Alan Cumming had been found murdered in a quarry, Johnson reported this was unrelated to any of his upcoming projects.

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