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George R. R. Martin Panics as ChatGPT Releases Special AI Just for Describing Deformed Genitalia

SANTA FE, New Mexico — Beloved fantasy writer George R. R. Martin was reportedly seen in a fervor today after AI service ChatGPT released a new writing AI specifically for describing deformed genitalia.

“Oh God, oh fuck it’s all over!” Martin said, frantically rushing around his home and packing an emergency suitcase. “My empire is going to crumble! If they’ve taught robots how to describe a half-man’s withered shrunken penis, what chance do I have? Dear Lord, I knew this day would come but not so soon! I thought it would take years for programs to emulate how to describe a wench’s disgusting, heaving bosoms. I’m fucking done for! I’ve seen the AI, it can describe warts, it can do gashes, it can even put a bulbous purple head on the end of someone’s awkward, pimpled manhood! Why me? Why now? When I was so close!”

ChatGPT users have reportedly begun to use the automated service to generate similar writing.

“Before I thought that an AI could never describe a wench’s pendulous breasts like a human could,” said user Eric Faltermeyer. “Now that ChatGPT can generate an infinite number of gross, diseased cocks and vaginas, we basically have the last Game of Thrones book at the ready before it’s even published.”

At press time, beloved horror author Stephen King reportedly joined Martin’s career worries after a new AI chatbot successfully put the word ‘Boo!’ on a piece of paper.