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Disney+ Announces New Show About Luke’s Hand That Got Cut Off

LOS ANGELES — Disney has announced details for a new Star Wars show on Disney+ during a recent earnings call, tentatively titled Luke’s Hand, which will tell the story of the hand Luke Skywalker lost during his fight with Darth Vader at the climax of The Empire Strikes Back.

 “After the completion of The Last Jedi, we were frankly terrified that we might run out of ideas for new Star Wars stories,” said Maxwell Door, VP of marketing for Disney. “We were also worried about leaving any loose threads dangling at the end of the Skywalker Saga. Luke’s Hand feels like the final missing piece to the original arc of the series, which will give us a chance to finally answer all of the burning questions fans have had about Luke’s missing appendance since 1980.”

The show will pick up with Luke’s severed hand where fans last saw it in The Empire Strikes Back, tumbling down into the sewers of the Cloud City of Bespin. A teaser trailer unveiled as part of the announcement showed glimpses of the hand finding its way across the galaxy to various other planets featured in previous Star Wars films.

“We’re really excited that Mark [Hamill] agreed to return and do motion capture work with his actual right hand,” said Charlie Ashby, senior creative director for Industrial Light & Magic. “Thanks to new advances in CGI, we’ve been able to actually de-age the hand to look like it actually did back in 1980. It’s going to cost 25 million dollars an episode, but it’s extremely worth it.”

Upon hearing the news, fans online were divided between calling it the greatest thing Star Wars has done since the last thing and already calling it a failure.

“Star Wars continues to pander to the woke crowd with this revisionism. Luke’s hand fell into storm drain where it was left to rot, end of story,” tweeted anti-Star Wars twitter account @JarJarJohnson. “This will be another misguided failure, just like The Last Jedi. #NotMyStarWars”

At press time, a petition began circulating online demanding the resignation of J.J. Abrams from the project even though he’s not actually involved in the show whatsoever.