Hello everyone! Here at Hard Drive, we pride ourselves on being the most ethical company in the games industry. So, inspired by no recent business decision in particular, we have decided to start charging our writers a few cents every time that someone reads their article.
We know that this policy might come as a shock to some, but we can assure everyone that this is the most fair way to generate increased revenue for the platform we provide, according to our own private research. Oh, you want to see the research we did? Stop being silly! Just trust us! This is the exact method we’ll use for counting the amount of money we’ll take from you too, so get used to it!
We also understand that some people might have comedy pieces in development with certain caveats that make this fee bad. If, for instance, you write a hit Hard Drive article that a lot of people see, you’ll notice that we’re going to be taking a lot of money from you. Rest assured that you’ll have plenty of of time to pull any in-development projects somewhere else, as long as you completely transfer all of the things you’ve created with us into a completely new environment. Why do all of the writers think this is such a bad idea?
Still confused about how this new fee is going to work? I’ve worked it all out in this table here for you. Check it out:
Oh shit, I got that from a friend. Ours are going to be pretty similar, though, with views instead of installs and without all those pesky zeroes in there.
And look, quite frankly, I get it if you don’t want to develop your next project Swith us. Maybe you just don’t have the cutthroat business acumen that I do! But good luck finding any good alternatives without me! We aren’t replaceable!
Also, why does everyone keep asking why I sold all my stock in the company last week? Could we talk about that less?