REDMOND, Wash. — Following Microsoft’s acquisition of Bethesda, new co-workers Master Chief and Doomguy had an awkward first day at the office after realizing they both wore the same thing to work.
“Oh, ha ha, isn’t that funny?” Master Chief nervously said after bumping into Doomguy in the break room. “What a coincidence. I can’t believe we both decided to wear our green robot armor today. Great minds, right?”
The two shooter icons spent their entire first day as co-workers awkwardly trying to sit as far away from one another as possible during meetings. The duo was unable to hide the fashion faux-pas as colleagues kept stopping them throughout the day to take pictures of the two of them side-by-side in their matching armor attire.
“Um, really bold of Chief, if you ask me,” said a visibly annoyed Doomguy. “I know I’m technically the newbie in this office, but this has been my signature look since before Master Chief even knew how to handle a shotgun. I know that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but could he at least have worn a different top?”
According to those familiar with the situation, tensions have risen between the co-workers.
“It feels like Doomguy is kind of self conscious or something. I think he’s trying to prove himself because he’s been practically running around the office all day,” said Marcus Fenix, a fellow employee. “Maybe slow it down a notch? We get that you’re faster than the Chief, but the whole sprinting thing is kind of a sore spot for him.”
“But on the other hand, I get it! Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but I’ve never been ripped off that hard,” Fenix added. “Hell, Chief’s even calling his new thing Halo Infinite. Sounds a bit similar to Doom Eternal if you ask me!”
At press time, Doomguy and Master Chief eventually agreed to coordinate their outfits to prevent further embarrassment. The two will now trade off wearing red and blue outfits every day to avoid any crossover.