June 28, 2022 Nintendo Files Copyright Claim on Italy Nintendo Files Copyright Claim on Italy KYOTO, Japan — Video game giant Nintendo has recently filed a copyright claim on the country of Italy, according to a company press conference. “It…
June 22, 2022 Elon Musk’s Daughter Tells Him She Will Be Cutting Family Member Headcount by 10% Elon Musk’s Daughter Tells Him She Will Be Cutting Family Member Headcount by 10% SAN FRANCISCO — Elon Musk’s 18-year-old daughter, who recently came out as transgender, alerted him to impending family member cuts via a curt email, sources…
May 3, 2022 Weird Jerk-Off Instruction Video Prompts Masturbating Viewer to Lock Family in Their Rooms and Burn Down the House Weird Jerk-Off Instruction Video Prompts Masturbating Viewer to Lock Family in Their Rooms and Burn Down the House LINCOLN, N.E. — Local college student Tyler Biggs recently fell victim to a horrifying and bizarre series of directions from a pornographic video. “So I’m…
February 1, 2022 Mom Excited to Tell You About New Game She Heard of Called “Minecraft” Mom Excited to Tell You About New Game She Heard of Called “Minecraft” SARATOGA SPRINGS, Fla. — Local sources report that Mom has been excited to call you, as she learned about one of those video games you…
