MAUVILLE CITY — In a miraculous turn of events, a thought to be paralyzed Sceptile has overcome the crippling status effect to defeat Wattson of the Mauville City Gym, sources in the gym confirm.
“I thought I had it in the bag!” claims the electric-type gym leader after embarrassingly giving up a badge and free TM to his young adversary. “A paralyzed person would never be able to do so much out there, I guess thunder waves don’t hit like they used to anymore.”
The victorious trainer’s Pokemon, who used nothing but sheer will and determination, powered through the debilitating condition, spamming physical moves until divine intervention allowed the immobilized monster to attack.
“It was nothing short of a miracle,” said one local Nurse Joy who was standing by during the gym battle. “It would typically take months, even years, for a Pokemon to rehabilitate from such a gruesome injury. Either that or a quick spray from a Paralyze Heal, the PokeMart’s groundbreaking medicinal spray that can suck the lightning right out of a Pokemon’s bones, now only $400 at Marts all across the region, get yours today!”
When approached by reporters regarding the sensational victory, the trainer from Littleroot Town told them he was doing a holistic challenge run.
“No potions, no healing items, and no trips to a Pokemon Center, I saw a guy on Twitch do it and thought, ‘that can’t be too hard’ so here I am,” he said. “The only way I can get my Pokemon to recover is by going all the way back home and having my mom do it.”
The recent influx of challenge runners rising the ranks through Hoenn has been concerning to the Gym leaders who make a living kicking the butts of naive children with underleveled Pokemon.
“It’s an epidemic!” says Sootopolis Gym Leader, Wallace. “These kids grind on route 1 for days and days and then slaughter every Gym Leader they approach. It’s an insult to the community and detrimental to the game, we need to do something about this.”
At press time, Officer Jennys have been placed at every route to ensure no Trainer is abusing the local wildlife just to complete some gratuitous challenge run.
