I’m into The Ghoul from Fallout, and I’m not ashamed. I was into most ghouls when I first played the games and I’m even more into the one that being portrayed by Walton Goggins, one of the world’s foremost Kinda Weird Guys that always catch the eyes of the girls and the gays. The man is great at his job, he doesn’t complain, he has a dog, and he takes care of his health religiously. What’s not to love?
My boyfriend doesn’t quite understand this attraction, however. I have tried to channel my Ghoul lust in a healthy way by trying to get some Ghoul and Vault Dweller roleplay going with my beloved. But he always responds immediately with the negatives, like, “Isn’t he riddled with radiation?” and, “Didn’t he try to have the Vault Dweller’s organs harvested for drugs?” and, “He doesn’t even have a nose. What if he doesn’t have other things?”
He was really trying to dim my sparkle, and I felt dejected. That is, until I got an idea. I started seeing posters for Halloween costume parties on Insta. It was settled. I was going to throw a Halloween party with a dress code. But not just any dress code: a dress code so specific it would leave my boyfriend no choice but to pick The Ghoul.
I watched him as he read over the invitation. “So it has to be a character from a show I’ve watched that’s based on a video game I’ve played? Oh, hell yeah! I’ll go as Joel from The Last of Us!” But I had planned for this. I pointed to the directions under that line. “’But if you cried at any point during the show, you cannot go as that character.’ That seems oddly specific and also kind of toxic…” I told him I’d found the rules online and that everyone said it ended up being super fun. “Well, I guess I could go as The Ghoul.”
I had him. Now I just had to seal the deal.
Knowing my boyfriend is incapable of passing up a bet, I waited until he and his buddies were talking and I told him some guy across the room bet he couldn’t possibly lasso anyone. His buddies egged him on. He took out his lasso and lassoed me straight into the bedroom.
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