HYRULE — In the wake of Princess Zelda finally starring in her own adventure, it’s come out that her salary for the project was the equivalent of 20 green rupees for every purple rupee Link was paid despite him taking a back seat this time.
“It’s absolutely ridiculous honestly. Zelda works just as hard as Link. More actually because she actually speaks,” said Zelda’s advisor Impa. “Not only was she paid less than what Link gets paid for his adventures but she was paid less than what Link was for this adventure. The Princess was more than happy to accept the salary because she just wants to make sure that girls finally have an adventure for them but I won’t be as nice about it. It’s one thing when she’s just a supporting character but she’s saving him this time, why is Link still making more? She can barely buy a pack of bombs with this salary.”
Rauru, one of the seven sages, was quick to defend giving Zelda a smaller wage than Link.
“Look, it has nothing to do with her gender, it’s just economics. When it comes to these adventures, people come for Link, he’s a known draw so he gets paid accordingly regardless of how much more work Zelda does or the fact that she’s the star of this one and he’s barely in it. When people hear The Legend of Zelda, they want to hear about one of Link’s many legendary adventures, it’s a risk just having a Legend of Zelda be about Zelda. Boys think that’s icky. Also she’s a nepo baby, she’s fine regardless of what we pay her.”
For his part, Link was very supportive of Zelda getting paid more for her work.
“…..” said the Hero of Hyrule before giving an enthusiastic thumbs up when asked if Zelda should get a higher salary.
At press time, Zelda was reportedly breaking into homes and smashing pots to increase her earnings.
