Growing up, I learned about life from all viewpoints. My mom, a social activist, taught me the meaning of respect by getting into public screaming matches with strangers on other people’s behalf. My dad, a degenerate gamer, taught me patience by waiting for steam sales, then promptly blowing his entire paycheck on a bunch of indie garbage. My perspective is what some might call enlightened.
However, I was presented with a challenge recently — a true test of my morals. I went on Steam this morning and found out an indie developer who has posted some truly heinous things online is having a “75% off ALL games from this publisher” sale. It honestly seems like the proceeds may go to a militia or something but… what a great deal.
What if my perfect game is in there waiting for me to buy it and never even install it? My whole body is itching to dump my entire 401k into this and buy so many games I get carpal tunnel just trying to scroll through them all. Unfortunately, the more games I buy, the more flannel Kevlar vests I’m probably funding. Will I see them on the news one day? Does it matter if I get the right price?
What would my mom say? I think she’d say, “Buy blue no matter who” but Dad would say “A man must separate price from artist.” OK, so my mom and dad clearly aren’t on the same, but she has a point. I don’t think I can take advantage of this extremely rare, incredible, once in a lifetime opportunity of a sale… right?
But what if dad is right? It wouldn’t be honest of me to only consider one side, right? Right? Hm. I think my dad would say something like, “You never know if this sale could be your last sale. You can fight the the good fight another day, son. Bad guys will stick around, unfortunately. But you know what won’t stick around? Chode Simulator and all its DLC (downloadable chode) packs for twenty five cents on the dollar.”
Update: OK, so I won’t tell you what I decided to do because I’m entitled to my privacy, but if you want to watch me play Chode Simulator I’ll be live streaming tonight at 7 P.M. ET.
