Amidst all the trailers and exciting announcements, sad news also came out of Sony’s State of Play Wednesday. It seems everyone’s favorite ottsel has unfortunately checked back into rehab after falling off the wagon yet again, sources confirmed.
“We hate to take anything away from this exhilarating day but we feel we should be open with our fans and Daxter’s fans as well,” said Gregory Sphealman, an executive at Sony. “While it is disappointing to hear that Daxter has had this setback, it’s also important to remember that he made the responsible choice and went back to rehab to try and get better, that takes bravery.”
The small furry wisecracker has become beloved in Haven City for years of heroic antics, sources confirmed. However according to reports from friends and family he has displayed a darker side after abusing the bottle on several occasions. Many residents of the city have admitted seeing him cause chaos and destruction while zooming around the city.
“Oh yeah, him and his pal with the greenish yellow hair are a serious danger to the city,” said one enraged resident. “One time these two just jumped up and pulled me out of my zoomer in mid air! Then they drive around and that little guy starts blasting crimson guard with a peacemaker. I appreciate them getting rid of the Baron I guess, but those clowns are still a threatening pair to be around.”
According to locals, accounts like these make many in town wonder if the streets wouldn’t even be safer with a sober Daxter. Jak, one of Daxter’s few remaining friends, defended him.
“Look Dax is a good guy, you gotta understand,” Jak began to say while absorbing a frightening amount of dark eco. “When we were just kids and I didn’t possess the ability to speak, he always stood up for me and I gotta do the same now, especially when people insist on spreading this false narrative. If it wasn’t For Daxter and me, you’d all have been eaten by metalheads years ago, so what if he needs to let off some steam with a drink every now and then?”
While Jak claimed to just be sticking up for his friend, others argued he was tacitly approving of his friend’s behavior. It was at that point, according to reports, that his skin turned white and purple energy began radiating from his body before he started wildly swinging at locals, sending them flying.
At Press time Samos the Sage had just been arrested for trying to sneak a bottle of liquor into the rehab facility.
