May 3, 2022 Guy Playing Chess Thrown Out of Checkers Tournament Guy Playing Chess Thrown Out of Checkers Tournament ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — A crafty, forward thinking participant was tossed out of the local checkers tournament, when it was revealed he had been playing chess…
May 2, 2022 Alt-Right Yu-Gi-Oh Player’s Deck Made Up Entirely of Blue-Eyes White Dragons Alt-Right Yu-Gi-Oh Player’s Deck Made Up Entirely of Blue-Eyes White Dragons McALLEN, Texas — Local Yu-Gi-Oh! player and outspoken alt-right activist Jason Redmond has been banned from tournaments of the popular card game after drawing heavy…
April 29, 2022 Opinion: How About We Just Start Playing the Board Game and Figure It Out as We Go Along? Opinion: How About We Just Start Playing the Board Game and Figure It Out as We Go Along? Hey guys, thanks for coming over. And really, stop apologizing. It’s fine that most of you were a little late getting here. I know half…
April 22, 2022 Good News: Kindergarten Classmate Who Conned You Out of Holographic Charizard Is Dead Good News: Kindergarten Classmate Who Conned You Out of Holographic Charizard Is Dead WILLIAMSBURG, Va. — In news you’ve waited more than two decades to hear, the little shit you traded your prized Pokémon card to when you…
April 5, 2022 Gambit Going to Win This Magic Tournament One Way or Another Gambit Going to Win This Magic Tournament One Way or Another WESTCHESTER, N.Y. — Famed X-Men member and amateur Magic: The Gathering player Remy “Gambit” Lebeau caused alarm earlier this week when he swore he was…
March 17, 2022 Billiards Announces New Ball Billiards Announces New Ball SEATTLE — Beloved parlor game Billiards, commonly known as Pool, will finally be getting an update with the addition of a new ball. The number…
January 22, 2022 D&D Group Not Close Enough Friends to Help DM Through Whatever’s Going on With Him Right Now D&D Group Not Close Enough Friends to Help DM Through Whatever’s Going on With Him Right Now TAMPA, Fla. — Despite meeting regularly for nearly three years, not one member of a local Dungeons and Dragons group considers their Dungeon Master, Cristian…
January 20, 2022 Logan Paul Really Hoping Overpriced Box of Fake Pokémon Cards He Bought Isn’t a Metaphor for His Career Logan Paul Really Hoping Overpriced Box of Fake Pokémon Cards He Bought Isn’t a Metaphor for His Career PUERTO RICO — Still reeling from his very avoidable public error in financial judgment, YouTuber, podcast host, and controversial celebrity boxer Logan Paul has reportedly…
January 11, 2022 First Edition Card Has Seen Some Shit First Edition Card Has Seen Some Shit SAN FRANCISCO — A rare, first edition printing of the Magic: the Gathering card Time Walk recently posted on eBay has quite clearly seen some…