#40 — Ryu
Ryu seems nice, but he is so into being a fighter that I don’t think there’s anything in the world he’d be willing to put above that. Like if I was really in a pinch and I absolutely NEEDED Ryu to help me out, I think he would… unless he has practice, in which case, oof, sorry bud, he really can’t.
#39 — Ken Masters
Ken is exactly like Ryu except that he’s a little bit funnier.
#38 — Solid Snake
Solid Snake? Solid Dude. Snake and I are in a big group chat and we’re always riffing and having fun and I haven’t seen him in like four years. Maybe that’s COVID’s fault? Hard to say, because we didn’t see each other in all of 2019.
#37 — Roy
Roy’s my boy. I’m not really close with the whole Fire Emblem crew — they kinda all stick to each other — but in world where we were forced to hang out by ourselves for some reason, I could see us becoming friends.
#36 — Mega Man
Mega Man will adapt to any situation and he’s always good to have in a hang that’s getting a little too outside of everyone’s comfort zone. BUT— he HAS to have gotten through that kind of hang at least once before, or else it’s going to be extremely difficult for him.
#35 — Mii Swordfighter
Mii Swordfighter is a huge weeb and I definitely like him, but he is constantly trying to get me to watch One Piece or some other show that’s like 4,000 episodes long.
#34 — Pikachu
I like Pikachu! Whenever I see them, I’m like, hey there Pikachu! And we do a little bit of small talk. And then we kinda just awkwardly wait for someone else to show up or for one of us to have to go.
#33 — Cloud Strife
Cloud would be a great friend if you had literally a single thing in common. Unfortunately, you do not. You both want to be friends with each other, and yet there is just absolutely NO common ground. Yousee other people having a blast hanging out with Cloud and you want that, but you can never have it.
#32 — Diddy Kong
Diddy Kong is a decent hang and a good dude, but is trying so hard to be as fun and as wild as Donkey Kong to the point where it is just frustrating to be around at times. He can be great one-on-one when he’s not going all out, but once there’s someone to perform for, he turns it on. Guy-who-just-took-an-improv-class energy.
#31 — Sonic
Sonic is a really nice guy and a solid friend, but unfortunately a Libertarian.
#30 — R.O.B.
R.O.B. was LEGENDARY in college and basically a real life Van Wilder, but now he’s 36, and kinda just always reminiscing about the glory days. Not a bad guy by any means, but you cannot be living in the fucking past like that, man. It’s time to move on.
#29 — Corrin
Corrin is the kind of person you are really good friends with for two months while you’re both going through some insane shit and then you kinda never see each other again because it reminds you too much of that time.
#28 — Wolf O’Donnell
Wolf is a really good drinking buddy, but your spouse hates him for some reason. So you can never really be too close — especially because you know they’re kinda right about him, but they’re also, at the same time, being way too harsh!
#27 — Toon Link
Toon Link is such an awesome guy. He’s always going off on adventures and telling me excitedly all about them and I love listening to them and I don’t know if he knows my last name. But he is undeniably awesome.
#26 — Bayonetta
People are intimidated by Bayonetta for some reason, but if you get to know her, she is just a totally normal person. Extremely down to earth. She is really good if you’re looking for someone to chat about TV or movies with, because she has seen everything, but you’re probably not getting a super deep convo with her. And that’s OK!
#25 — Ridley
Ridley is one of those guys who, when you were kids, you would hang out and he would be like, “do you wanna see a video of a guy dying?” and you’d say yea and you still have nightmares about it to this day. But now, as an adult, he got way more mature, while still keeping his weirdness to a big extent. Sometimes it’s a bit too much, but for the most part, it’s nice to hang out with someone who is just on a totally different wavelength.
#24 — Inkling
Inkling loves talking shit about people to you and it’s really fun in the moment, but you’re 1000% sure she’s also talking shit about you with other people. You don’t have proof, but you know it.
#23 — Isabelle
Isabelle is a straight up professional. If you’re going on a friends trip, Isabelle is the one who does all the planning and organizing and she loves it. She’s not super interesting to hang out with or anything, but she is undeniably nice and considerate.
#22 — Princess Daisy
Daisy is very nice and cool and has an extremely dark sense of humor that comes out sometimes that genuinely scares me. Like how did you think of that?” kinda shit. And she’s not doing dead baby jokes she found on the internet, she is coming up with these herself. And yet, extremely kind and normal person in all other instances.
#21 — Ike
Listen: Ike fights for his friends. And if you’re his friend? He fights for you. What exactly does that mean? I have no fucking idea and I don’t think he does either. But I do think he means it. And one day, if he has to fight for some reason, it will be for his friends.
