TINLEY PARK, Ill. — In an effort to drive more business from consumers who listen to lots of mattress advertisements already, the bedding retail chain Mattress Depot has announced an exclusive offer of three months of a paid podcast subscription with the qualifying purchase of any mattress.
“The numbers don’t lie, podcasts and mattresses are the perfect team-up,” said Manager Scott ‘Mattress Daddy’ Frowley as he filled out his credit card info on Patreon to finish setting up a new podcast subscription for a customer. “Think about it: you lay the side of your head on a pillow, and that’s where headphones go, too. Our customers use our products to help them sleep, just like some of those relaxing ASMR podcasts. Also, picking a new podcast and a new mattress can both be comforting at first but then eventually get old, stiff, and uncomfortable. I could go on and on!”
Customers of Mattress Depot have had mixed reactions to news of the promotion.
“What? Oh, the discount code thing, yeah,” said Matt Grables, taking out his airpods and pausing one of the many podcasts he listens to throughout the day. “I didn’t really pay attention to that. I just like to walk through the store at 1.5x speed and quickly browse around while I’m doing something else.”
“Oh my gosh yes, I’m so happy my favorite mattress store is getting legit sponsors!” said Jillian Frezza, sporting an official Mattress Depot hoodie purchased from the Mattress Depot merch store. “Honestly I’ll probably just cancel the podcast subscription once the three months are up. What’s important is supporting those good mattress boys down at MD.”
At press time, Mattress Depot also announced a new “Friend of the Depot” subscription service offering a free anime waifu body pillow to those pledging a $30-per-month donation.
