CORUSCANT – The Star Wars subreddit has reportedly decided to continue being as pretentious as possible, this time by having a seven hundred comment thread under a post titled “I’ve never seen Star Wars before, which movie should I start with?”
“As always, you should have read the post about this pinned in the sidebar. I know it’s not visible on the new website but it’s your fault for not knowing about it. I’ll give you a pass this one time, because I was planning to make a post on this topic anyway,” wrote subreddit moderator u/Plagueis_The_High.
“Some fake fans, such as George Lucas, will tell you to watch them in chronological order. They are wrong. Obviously you need to start with Star Wars (for newbies like you, that’s known as ‘Episode IV’). As soon as you reach the scene where the rebels plan for the Battle of Yavin, pause and watch Rogue One. Once you’re done with that little flashback, watch the rest of Episode IV and all of Episode V, before watching all three prequels and finishing up with Return of the Jedi.”
Eighteen other users then replied to this comment with their clearly very important additions to the watch order.
“This is terrible advice. It’s a good start, but missing a lot of essential information. You need to pause A New Hope when Obi-Wan is talking with Han at the cantina as soon as Han says ‘You’ve never heard of the Millenium Falcon? It’s the ship that made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs.’ Seeing as a parsec is a unit of distance, this line will be confusing to a newcomer unless you watch Solo between that line and the next one,” reads the most upvoted reply to the original comment.
“You’ve also foolishly forgotten to tell them to stop and watch season 1 of Andor when Cassian says ‘Rebellions are built on hope’ in Rogue One. Rookie mistake, bud. And one more thing – what are you doing having them skip Clone Wars? You absolutely must watch it after Attack of the Clones to understand Anakin’s character. And they need to watch the sequels, but not before all three seasons of Mandalorian, with Book of Boba Fett between seasons two and three.”
The final relevant comment appears to have reached a watch order that everyone was able to agree on.
“Everything above is correct, but I’d like to make a few additions. The exact order to watch clone wars is a little more complicated than previous comments made it out to be. You can google it if you want, it’s not my job to educate you. You need to also watch Rebels and Obi-Wan Kenobi before you go back to Episode VI…” The middle section of the comment has been removed, as it was entirely about why Star Wars is better than Star Trek.
“On the topic of the post-ROTJ content, you should also watch Ahsoka Season one before Force Awakens. And during Force Awakens when Ben (Kylo Ren) is talking to Darth Vader’s burnt helmet (sorry for spoilers), pause and rewatch every scene with Vader in it from the original trilogy. Pretty sure that’s up on YouTube somewhere.”
The thread had to be locked for being off topic after users began coming up with dozens of new slurs to call Babu Frik.
