Disney Adult Overjoyed by Hidden Mickey Found During Colonoscopy
ORLANDO, Fla. — Diehard Disney fan Adam Finemann was ecstatic to notice in his colonoscopy results that his bowels contained…
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Jus Kaplan
28 stories found
Elon Musk Reaches Out to Dozens of Fired Federal Employees With Impregnation Offers
WASHINGTON — After terminating the jobs of thousands of U.S. government workers, Elon Musk has reportedly extended dozens of offers…
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“I Was Born In The Wrong Century,” Says Gamer Playing Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 Who Would Have Died by Age 10 in Medieval Period
JERSEY CITY, N.J. — Frank Liberelli is convinced his life would have been better in the early 15th century after…
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Ketamine Distances Self From Elon Musk
BERLIN — Emphasizing that it supports peace, love, unity, and respect, the drug ketamine has publicly distanced itself from Elon…
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In Memory Of David Lynch I’m Rewatching Twin Peaks Except For Most Of It
The passing of David Lynch is undeniably a huge loss for the world of cinema. With classics like ‘Eraserhead’ and…
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In Memory of David Lynch, I’m Rewatching Twin Peaks Except for Most of It
The passing of David Lynch is undeniably a huge loss for the world of cinema. With classics like ‘Eraserhead’ and…
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Ryan Murphy Lets Out Shriek of Pure Joy After Seeing How Hot Alleged CEO Killer Is
LOS ANGELES — Famed Hollywood writer, director, and producer Ryan Murphy has reportedly yelped in a startling fit of ecstasy…
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Overwatch Halloween Costume Recognized, Ignored
SAN DIEGO — At his office’s Halloween party, Travis Pameno was quick to recognize a coworker in a meticulously crafted…
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Sick Fuck Enjoys Board Game Parts of Mario Party More Than Mini Games
MINNEAPOLIS — In a disturbing revelation that has left acquaintances confused and appalled, local man Kevin Whittaker, 34, has admitted…
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