PLAINS, Ga. — Former president and centenarian Jimmy Carter fulfilled his goal of voting for Kamala Harris in the 2024 American presidential election and has turned his focus to a new target: pre-ordering the long-awaited Nintendo game ‘Metroid Prime 4: Beyond.’
“We recognize the blessing and privilege to still have him with us,” said Carter’s granddaughter Margaret Alicia Carter. “He has lived a full life and is sure to leave a legacy of selfless civil service, noble pride in his American roots, and an unwavering dedication to first-party Nintendo titles. Grandma held out just long enough to complete her run of ‘Tears of the Kingdom,’ so it’s no surprise to us that grandpa has his sights set on a similar goal.”
Although the previous entry in the Metroid Prime series released in 2007, the fourth installment has undergone a series of setbacks, with some commentators speculating that it is in development hell.
“Nintendo already scrapped the whole project and assigned a different developer to start over completely, and that was back in 2019,” said Julie Valdez, a games writer at Wired. “Supposedly Prime 4 will now release in 2025, but my sources say they want to bookend it between ‘StarTropics 3’ and another couple dozen ‘Mario Kart 8’ tracks. There may be further delays down the line, as Nintendo has apparently devoted a large percentage of their workforce to localizing ‘Mother 3’ for Western audiences.”
While Carter remains undeterred despite Prime 4’s rocky development journey, he does admit to one other wish.
“I’m sure the Big N will get it done with Samus Aran’s next epic sci-fi adventure,” said the former president. “But I won’t truly die happy until we get a new Kid Icarus game. I’d even settle for a port of Uprising. C’mon, this Georgia peach wants his Pit.”
Carter was last seen entirely motionless, being fitted with a green arm cannon in preparations for the family Halloween party.
