December 2024 - Page 3 of 6

Hailey Joel Osment Admits Kingdom Hearts IV has Been Delayed Because he was Trapped in a Simulation of his Dreams and Just Now Escaped

Brendan Osorio • December 19, 2024

Shocking news came out recently that actor Haily Joel Osment, famous for films such as The Sixth Sense and A.I.…

Right-Wing Sonic Fan Befuddled by So-Called Ultimate Life Form

Matt Fresh • December 19, 2024

CHARLOTTESVILLE, N.C. — Local right-wing gamer Kevin Thompson, known in online circles as “TheReichStuff88”, has taken to social media to…

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Courier Shot in The Head Near Goodsprings Just Wants a Turbo Man Doll For His Kid

Brendan Osorio • December 18, 2024

GOODSPRINGS — A courier shot in the head near Goodsprings recently miraculously has survived and is expected to make a…

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Luigi Mangione Sentenced to 25 Years of United Healthcare Coverage

Johnny Amizich • December 18, 2024

MINNETONKA, Minn — Luigi Mangione, the alleged shooter of former UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, has been sentenced to 25 years…

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Batman Distraught to Learn He Smells, Robin Laid Egg, Joker Got Away

Peter Ferrarese • December 17, 2024

GOTHAM CITY — Masked vigilante Batman has reportedly been beside himself after he was informed by a group of teenagers…

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Nintendo Adds Exact Moment of Your Death to Zelda Timeline

Ben Friedman • December 17, 2024

KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo sent Zelda fans into a frenzy after a surprise update to the series’ official timeline to…

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Elon Musk Reveals Favorite Movie of 2024 Was “Dark humor Offensive jokes Family Guy Compilation (not for snowflakes)”

Sean Fallon • December 16, 2024

AUSTIN, Texas — Elon Musk released his top ten films of 2024 with his top spot going to a YouTube…

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Rule 34 Image Grossly Underestimating Kirby’s Fellatory Capabilities

Steve Packosky • December 16, 2024

MINNEAPOLIS — A Rule 34 image portraying notable platformer icon Kirby vastly underestimated his presumed capabilities in performing fellatio, disappointed…

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Report: Apathetic Middle Class Didn’t See Reason to Vote in 2024 Game Awards

Patrick Sullivan • December 14, 2024

LOS ANGELES — A post-show poll from Reuters revealed that the middle class did not see any reason to vote…

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Game Night: Playing A Game Within A Game in ‘Among Ashes’

Thomas Wilde • December 13, 2024

In my experience, if you’re into horror at all, there are a couple of things that can and will scare…

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