June 22, 2022 Activision Blizzard Cancels Tony Hawk 3+4 Remake After Hearing It Would Generate Some Amount of Goodwill for Company Activision Blizzard Cancels Tony Hawk 3+4 Remake After Hearing It Would Generate Some Amount of Goodwill for Company SANTA MONICA, Calif. — Skateboarding legend Tony Hawk has revealed that Activision Blizzard has canceled any plans for a Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3+4 HD…
June 20, 2022 Disheveled Mario Reveals Those Coins of His Are Worthless Disheveled Mario Reveals Those Coins of His Are Worthless MUSHROOM KINGDOM — A filthy and penniless Mario Mario made a public plea for charity this morning, revealing that the iconic coins he’s been collecting…
June 17, 2022 “You Guys Talkin’ About Gorn?” Asks Roommate Who’s Always Trying to Get You to Play Gorn “You Guys Talkin’ About Gorn?” Asks Roommate Who’s Always Trying to Get You to Play Gorn GREEN BAY, Wis. — For the third time this week, Gus, your roommate that insists 2019’s virtual reality gladiator combat simulator Gorn was the game…
June 17, 2022 Game You Spent 27 Hours Downloading Sucks Ass Game You Spent 27 Hours Downloading Sucks Ass NEW ORLEANS — A Knight’s Wish, the ambitious RPG that you spent over an actual day downloading, actually kind of sucks cock, sources have confirmed. …
June 17, 2022 Shigeru Miyamoto Clearly Just Pretending to Like Luigi’s Hand-Crafted Father’s Day Card Shigeru Miyamoto Clearly Just Pretending to Like Luigi’s Hand-Crafted Father’s Day Card KYOTO, Japan — Legendary game designer Shigeru Miyamoto reportedly had a less than enthusiastic reaction this Father’s Day when being presented with a homemade card…
June 17, 2022 ‘Nintendo!’ Announces Mario ‘Nintendo!’ Announces Mario EARTH — His proclamation echoing simultaneously from millions of booting-up Nintendo consoles around the world, the iconic video game star Mario proudly announced “Nintendo!” earlier…
June 17, 2022 YouTuber Trying to Predict Next Nintendo Direct Accidentally Figured Out Who Really Killed JFK YouTuber Trying to Predict Next Nintendo Direct Accidentally Figured Out Who Really Killed JFK ORLANDO, Fla. — YouTuber TheGravyGamer set out to predict what Nintendo might reveal in its next Direct, only to find out who really assassinated former…
June 16, 2022 GameStop Checkout Asks If You’d Like to Donate Power-Up Rewards Points to a Gamer in Need GameStop Checkout Asks If You’d Like to Donate Power-Up Rewards Points to a Gamer in Need ALBANY, N.Y. — A GameStop clerk has awkwardly asked if you’d like to donate your Power-Up Rewards balance to a destitute gamer in need, other…
June 16, 2022 Microsoft Just Going to Release a Mario Game and See What Happens Microsoft Just Going to Release a Mario Game and See What Happens REDMOND, Wash. — Microsoft Gaming just announced it is bringing one of the most iconic video game characters ever, Mario, to the Xbox. Although they…
