Loot Box Under Christmas Tree Contains Hideous Cosmetic You’ll Never Wear
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"I hope you like it, dear," your mother reportedly said.
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Tag: hdmain
1330 stories found
Child Sneaking Downstairs to Catch Santa on Christmas Eve Finds Living Room Entrance Replaced with Fog Gate
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"He’s growing up too fast. He’s going up against Nicholas, Saint of Cinder, totally under-leveled."
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World of Warcraft Classic Hardcore Adds Dad Who Turns off the Internet When You Play Past Your Bedtime
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“It’s something I never knew I wanted, but now I can’t stop thinking about the possibilities. Ever since I was…
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Jedi Council Encourages NoFap Policy For Improved Force Sensitivity
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"I’ve never felt closer to joining the Dark Side.”
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REPORT: Disney Only Producing ‘Inside Out 2’ On Order to Retain Copyright On Emotions
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EMERYVILLE, Calif. — Disney and Pixar Studios are being forced to produce a sequel to Inside Out after being notified…
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Doctor Ignores Patient Spamming “I Need Healing”
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“I am in need of healing. Therefore, they must heal me. That is their role and I will continue to…
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Persona 5 Fan Thrilled to Buy ‘Persona 5 Tactica’ at Launch and Again When It Gets a Rerelease
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SACRAMENTO — One avid Persona 5 fan was so excited for the recent release of spinoff Persona 5 Tactica that…
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Wikipedia Regretfully Announces It Will Have to Start Killing Hostages
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SAN FRANCISCO — Free, online encyclopedia Wikipedia has released a new banner announcing that the reference site will be forced…
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Gollum Claims Raw Fish Diet Responsible for His Incredible Longevity
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MIDDLE EARTH — Local hermit Gollum credited his pescetarian diet for his 500-year lifespan, nearly five times higher than that…
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New 4K Remaster of Taxi Driver Will Reveal Who Travis Bickle’s Reflection Was Talking To
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NEW YORK — A newly remastered version of Martin Scorsese’s Taxi Driver will reveal the identity of the mysterious figure…
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