LOS ANGELES — Trade magazine Variety is in hot water with film studio executives after allegations of journalism were levied at the publication. Variety has denied all allegations.
“We want to make it known to all studio executives that we wholeheartedly deny any allegations of journalism made against us,” claimed Variety Editor-in-Chief William Rosen in an official statement. “These are unfounded, completely fabricated falsehoods made to sully our good name. We would never risk our reputation with our wonderful partners at Disney, Warner Brothers, Amazon, Apple and all other major studios by engaging in honest journalism.”
The studio heads are taking the allegations very seriously. Disney CEO Bob Iger stated they would be launching an internal investigation.
“These are serious allegations that we do not take lightly. I don’t know about the other studios but Disney will be launching a full investigation into Variety to determine if the claims against them are true. It is absolutely unacceptable for our most trusted hit piece partner to be engaging in acts of real journalism. If they go down that road, it’s only a matter of time before they are uncovering dirty truths about us instead of blaming our failures on young upcoming actresses who choose to champion human rights.”
Hollywood actors have also weighed in on the ongoing controversy.
“It’s just so terrible to hear,” said Evil Queen and alleged actress Gal Gadot in a video posted to social media. “If Variety is going to start doing real reporting then who is going to frame me as a victim when one of my co-stars publicly advocates for an end to the Palestinian genocide. Without Variety reporting false narratives people will start to get the right idea about me. I mean could you imagine that? Could you imagine all the people,” Gadot then broke out into an unwatchable rendition of John Lenon’s Imagine.
At press time, as a show of good faith Variety is offering studios a 2 for 1 deal on hit pieces against actors who don’t toe the company line.
