When I saw that Humble Bundle was selling nine Leisure Suit Larry games plus artbooks and soundtracks for just $7, I had to jump on it. No brainer. The 80’s version of me would never forgive the current version of me if I didn’t. One problem though: even though I’m a grown man and can do what I want, I still have a wife and kids and pervy comedy games aren’t exactly family entertainment.
So, I convinced my wife that I bought the Leisure Suit Larry Complete Collection so I could write this article.
Even though Hard Drive pays the talent exactly what we are worth, I am still going to make a slight profit off of this, which was a bonus when I made my case to the missus. But mostly, I leaned on her support of my love of video games and writing.
“I’m so proud of you Danny. You’ve always admired Hard Drive from afar and now you get to write articles for them,” my wife said, unaware that even the EGA depictions of cleavage in Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Lounge Lizards still get me going. “I know these games can be raunchy, but it’s all just research so you can keep living your dream.”
What I’ll ask of you at this point, my valued reader, is to just keep reading, to look like you’re really enjoying this bit of satire. That way, my wife won’t be suspicious when it’s 2:00am and I’m trying to bed Passionate Patti in the third installment of the series. Here, I’ll even include another quote to keep up appearances:
“My Dad told me Leisure Suit Larry was an 80’s classic. It’s incredible what entertained horny gamers back before the internet,” recounted my 16-year-old son, who has never seen the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.
Ok, here she comes. Give me a little chuckle right…now. Good, good, she just asked if my article got another like on Twitter. Maybe give it a share on Facebook – my wife will definitely see that. Now let’s cement the ruse with one more quote.
“Ew, these games are gross. This was actually popular in the 1900’s?” questioned my daughter, who is becoming more and more thankful she’s about to escape to college. “Is my parents’ marriage ok? Why would my dad want to play these games? Ironically, I hope.”
At press time, I realized I may have purchased the Leisure Suit Larry bundle just to keep up the bit.
